If you could see me now!

Yesterday, they came to hook me up to the ambulatory eeg machine. It's a portable EEG. They hook up 22 wires to the head, glue them on, cover them in gauze, tape it down, then cover it in a mesh head cover then they tape that down. Then you're hooked up to your portable eeg machine which is a bit bigger than a fanny pack. It has to be carried around all day. I will be on this machine for a few days. Maybe I'll have it off by tomorrow. We'll see!

Really GREAT Italian food!

Scotto and I went out last night with my brother and sister-in-law to this great place called Bravo! Cucina Italiana. We went to the new place in Bayshore. What a GREAT meal! The service was extremely friendly and very solicitous, the food was fast, hot and unbelievably delicious! The ambiance of the place is unreal. It looks just like you're sitting in Rome. Big, beautiful roman columns and huge overblown chandeliers. The yellow-ish tinted walls, the dark chairs with the white table-clothed tables. It's unbelievably beautiful. I know we can't afford to eat there on a regular basis, but for a once-upon-a-time kinda thing, it was truly fantastic! I'm so glad we went with them. I hadn't been feeling well a lot of this past week.

On the 19th, someone is coming here to hook me up to the EEG machine here at home and then gauze my head so I can leave the EEG hooked up for a few days straight. Hopefully, they'll get a better idea as to what is going on in this brain of mine.

It was so nice to get a night out, with no kids and just be...me. I'm always someone's mom, someone's friend, someone's daughter, someone's wife, someone's housekeeper, someone's SOMETHING. Every now and then it's nice to just get out and be...ME again. I forget after so much time of being everything for everyone, what it feels like to just be me. I like it. And I like me.

Been sick

My apologies for my absence. I've been sick again. Real dizzy and nauseated. Lots of throwing up and all sorts of icky stuff y'all don't wanna know about. I'm going to physical therapy today because my doctor wants me to go. The physical therapist said she didn't think they could do anything for me because some of my problems are too far gone...and I just want to go in and get that in writing so she can give it to my doctor to prove to her that physical therapy in this case is useless.

I'll let you know how that goes.

Lunesta (actualy, LOONesta read on and you'll see)

So I've always had a helluva time sleeping. I don't have a problem with just getting to sleep, but I also have a problem staying asleep as well. I've had this problem for probably my entire adult life (at least as far back as I can remember). For this problem, I was taking Ambien. It didn't do shit. And when I say "shit"...I mean nuttin, nada, bupkiss, zero, zilch, jack diddly squat...NOTHING! So I went to see my good ol' doc last week and asked her what her thoughts were on the subject (being sleep-deprived a lot of times means ya can't even think for yourself anymore) and she told me she thought I should try Loonesta. Now I know it's really spelled L-U-N-E-S-T-A, but it makes ya so damn loony, I'll spell it my way, thank you very much. The first night I took it, I'll admit, it made me a little drowsy and I slept ok for the most part. I was having this dream that to me seemed more vivid than I had normally remembered my dreams to be. I didn't attribute this to the medicine and moved on with my day. Later that morning, I noticed that every damn thing I ate or drank had such a nasty bitter taste to it, that I couldn't eat or drink anything at all! Everytime I tried, I felt sick because the taste was so bad. I thought maybe I was sick or something, and again...moved on with my day. I've been on the Loonesta now for about 4 days. It's been 4 days of nasty, awful, terrible, rotten bitter tasting EVERYTHING (except things made of chocolate, go figure) and nights filled with just the most vivid, colorful, strange dreams. The dreams don't even feel like they're mine. The only way I can clearly describe it is that it feels like I'm trippin!! The colors are sooooo vivid, the dream is so unreal, yet unbelievably life-like!! The dreams wake me up about 3-4 times a night...and when they wake me, it feels like I'm not me. The dreams don't have me in them, they're not about me...and I don't recognize anyone in them. I'm having SOMEONE ELSE'S dreams!!

This prompted me to do a little Googling on the subject...here is what I found.
When you click here basically what it says is that a shitload of other people have the same problem I have. Exactly...to the letter, same kind of problem. Then...when you click here it says a lot of the same things on the other page only in more detail than before.

I can't believe I finally have an answer to why I've been feeling like I have!
Tonight...it's back to Ambien, let's see what happens.

P.S. I felt so shitty yesterday that I actually had to walk out of my son's wrestling meet and leave him with his dad so I could come home. I've never missed ANYTHING my kids have done outside of school. I was REALLY upset. Fortunately, my boy was really understanding and didn't give me too much of a hard time about it.

Forgot to tell you!

Andy took a silver medal at his wrestling meet on Sunday! Woooohoooooooo! I am SO proud of him! He's got another meet this coming Saturday. I hope he does well!!

Gotta stay up all night

I have an EEG tomorrow morning at 8am and it's required that I be sleep-deprived. So I have to stay up all night. I've managed to wrangle myself a bunch of friends that are willing to IM me and call me at various times throughout the night to keep my sorry ass awake. I sure hope it works! I'm not allowed any caffeine because I guess it changes the EEG, so I'm on my own on this one! I'm sure it'll be ok, but I tell ya...after my 8am appointment, you can bet your sweet ass I'm laying down for a nice, long nap! It always takes three days to get that damn electrode glue outta your hair!! You'd think after 20 years of this shit, they'd find a better way to get them little bastards to stick!

Wish me luck :)

Well, we did it

We filed for physical custody of my stepson. We've been wanting to do this for awhile now but there were certain conditions that had to happen before we could file papers. Now the thing about Wisconsin custody cases is this: EVERY case gets sent to mediation before the case can go to court. I know Scotto's ex-wife, there ain't no way IN HELL she'll mediate anything! Hopefully it doesn't take the mediator long to see she won't be willing to work with them and he'll give up soon so we can get this matter into court and over with.

Somewhat bummed

There are these things that Scotto and I have been wanting to do once we had the money to do them. Unfortunately, I can't go into detail about what these things are, but I assure you, they are not superficial or shallow in nature. They are very important to us and our family. Lately, it seems like right when we get to a point when we think we may be able to achieve our goals...reality happens and we're not able to do what we are wanting to do here. I'm not being selfish or childish, throwing a temper tantrum or having a hissy fit. I'm not being self-absorbed or looking for pity. I'm just stating facts. There is one little person in this world that has been very patient, sitting back and waiting for us to have what we need to get these things done and I feel just awful that we have yet to be able to do them for him.

I just did some creative accounting here, trying to figure out if there was some way to move funds around to make things happen this week...and I just don't see it. Scotto's at work and he doesn't yet know that we aren't going to be able to make it work out again this week. I assure you, this thing we need to do is more important to him than it is to me...not to say that it isn't important to me, because it is. I feel terrible that I have to tell him it's not going to happen.

God, I just hate days like this. Where are these damn money trees anyway???

P.S.

I've had a fever for the past 3 days. I have no other symptoms aside from being tired and having the chills. I had a flu shot this year again and I wonder if I managed to get the flu and the flu shot is just keeping it from getting too bad. I'm sure it'll pass...it's just irritating to feel shitty when I have so much to get done.

Ok...done bitchin'...Andi out

A busy, busy girl

Friday night, I took my hubby and son to my favorite restaurant about a half hour north of where we live. As always, everything was really yummy, service was quick, but very nice. A good time was had by all. We stopped in to see my sister and sister-in-law afterwards because they live in the city we ate in. It was nice to see them in their new home. They just purchased their first home. They're so excited and are spending most of their time (and unfortunately, their money as well) making their new home exactly what they want it to be.

Saturday, Scott and Josh had plans to go to World of Wheels which was in Milwaukee over the weekend (www.worldofwheels.com) and I had nothing planned. My sister and her wife invited me to come visit them while hubby and kiddo were gone so they drove me up there and then went on their way. Normally, I'd have driven myself but hubby wanted to use my car to go to Milwaukee. Anyway, I went to visit them...we ordered some Chinese from a local restaurant and just sat around chatting, watching some TV and just catching up. It was really nice seeing them again. I don't see them nearly enough.

Today, we have another wrestling tournament for Andy. This one is about 45 minutes away. They are usually all-day events. I hope the snow stays away long enough for us to get there and back. After we get home, I need to get to the grocery store. They originally said it wasn't suppose to snow until tonight but now it looks like it'll snow all dayum day. I sure hope it doesn't snow too bad while we're out. Wish my kid some luck on his wrestling tournament today!

Just checking this out

I want to see how this looks...ignore me LOL


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